Jackie K

My parents were together for about 16 years, before my mom decided that she couldn't be with my dad any more because he's never going to change his ways about gambling and drinking. Before we lost our house because we couldn't pay rent anymore; my mom, siblings, and I were living with my grandparents for about a year and a half. While my dad lived with his brother on their own, we basically became strangers to each other. I preferred living with my mom because she would give me more freedom. My dad was very strict; he didn't allow me to do lot things because he was very protective. I would always neglect his love and affection for me. Every chance he got to see me, he would give me kisses on the forehead but I thought it was embarrassing because I was getting older.
     I would only see him once a month and when I did, he would take my siblings and I shopping. Since I didn't have many clothes, I would take advantage of his offer. The reason he took us shopping was because he didn't want to pay child support o he came to an agreement with my mom to pay her in a different way. After a couple months of that method didn’t help, my mom told him that it wasn't enough to support us. She asked him to give her more money to put food on the table and to pay for rent. He disagreed with what she asked for and she chose the hard way by applying for child support. When that happened, we didn't communicate as much as we used to.
   I always told him how I've always wanted to go watch the 49ers play. I asked to go a 49ers football game and he made it happen in 2013. It was my first and last time going to a football game with him. He would visit us on our birthdays. When my birthday came on October 14, 2014 he decided to bring some money as a gift. As the holidays were coming up I was sad knowing that my mom wasn't going to be able to get us any Christmas gifts because she lost her job in 2012. My dad knew we weren't going to want to spend time with him for the holidays because he didn't like to celebrate anything. But he did think of us, he went to get us Christmas gifts, which I least expected. I wasn't happy with the gifts he got us but it did make me happy the fact that he tried his best.
   We started getting closer and closer texting each other about football when the season came back. When it was Super Bowl weekend, he texted me that he wanted to go watch it with us on Sunday, February 2, 2015 with his lady friend and us. My little brother and I did decide to go with him. He picked us up that day and took us to Buffalo Wild Wings. We spent the whole day there watching football, eating, taking pictures, and bonding like never before. That's the last time we've hung out. He did come to take my little brother out for his birthday in March and I seen him for a couple minutes. I didn't go with them because I went out with my friend that day. We stopped communicating when the football season was over because we didn't have anything else in common. Football was the only thing that made us have an actual bond together.
   When the season was over he started hanging out with his friends more. I don't think none of his friends that he was hanging out with known him as much as his family did. We all know my dad was the most cautious person you'll ever meet. He always put other people first before himself. If someone were drunk he wouldn't let him or her drive. He would either take their keys away or he would take the person home. He wouldn't go anywhere if he was drunk or buzzed or even if he was had a can. Then this April 8, 2015 changed the way in which I look at life. My dad decided to have his "friends" come help him fix his motorcycle and chill at home. They had a barbecue and were drinking a lot this night before they decided to convince him to go out to the bowling alley. He did make it to the bowling alley safely. After they got there they wanted to go to the Capital Casino to go gamble. But my dad did tell them lets wait for my brother to get out of work and sober up. They somehow got him to decide to ride his motorcycle to the casino without his brother being there with him. On the way to the casino they took the freeway and supposedly he did something that we never would think he would've done. They said he popped a willy and was going about 165 mph. They couldn't see where he went afterwards. So they got off their bikes searching for him for 30 minutes. When they found he was unresponsive and finally called the cops and ambulance to get help and when they arrived he was still unresponsive.
They called his sister telling her what had happened to my dad. My dad's mom called my mom's dad to tell him the news. My grandpa came out to tell my aunt to come tell me. While I was on the phone having a great conversation with a friend that night I received the worst news ever. Then I heard a knock at my door from my aunt calling my name " Jackie Jackie". I opened the door all happy and said "Yeah what's up." My grandpa came to the door and said "Buk Fanh thy lil." i was confused maybe they over heard the wrong person's name because his brother name is Banh. I thought it was my uncle because he had diabetes and was very sick himself. I called my grandma saying, "Where's my dad"? She replied, " He's gone baby girl." Then that's when I got the news the best father I ever had, was no longer with me... Love your parents while they are still alive, you will realize after they are gone on how much they and sacrificed for you. Make time for them while you still can.

Jackie Khamphoumy